Why the narcissist chose to attack you.

Reasons a predatory narcissist will target you.

1.  You refuse to go along with their lies.  You challenge their fantasy world where they are the brightest, most handsome, most wanted person around.  It's easy to overlook this - if you're accustomed to seeing the best in everyone.  However, folks with full-blown narcissistic behavior will often double down on their behavior if you show any resistance to their made-up version of reality.  Even when evidence clearly proves they are wrong, a full blown narcissist will often continue the destructive behavior out of their own conditioned programming.

2.  Your sense of self does not move based on what other people think of you.  This makes you immune to manipulation.  Narcissistic games only work on those who are willing to be defined, boxed in, and manipulated by other people. 

3.  You are empathetic and assertive when it comes to your own or someone else's health (mental, physical, emotional), needs, or wants.  You are sensitive to the needs of the people around you, as well as assertive enough to make sure those needs are being met.

Narcissists need a constant supply of folks with a high-degree of agreeability, low self esteem, and a lack of assertiveness.  (This is why they target broken, traumatized, and intoxicated victims who have shaky if any boundaries.)

For many of us being compliant and agreeable made us the perfect target.  But it also helped keep us alive.  So, it's very important not to get down on yourself for functioning in the best way you knew how.  The fact you were targeted does not negatively reflect upon you.  All blame lies entirely with the lying, manipulative, destructive piece of trash who wanted nothing more than to use you.

But always - keep asking yourself - What do I want?  How can I get it? 

It's a narcissist's kryptonite.

You see, narcissists need folks who are willing to live in a made-up reality where the narcissist's ego is always the top priority.

If you challenge them with caring about the folks they impact, or healing the damages their actions have caused - expect them to push back in negative and toxic ways.  This doesn't mean stop challenging them.  It just means you can't take anything they do or say personally, because they are broken and damaged predators who need a constant supply of victims.

Denying a life-long narcissist of their supply is a sure way to get attacked.

And in a perfect world I would tell you that your safety matters more than what others think. 

However, we are not living in a perfect world, and if folks don't start standing up for decency, morals, accountability, and social responsibility we will all be reduced to living as animals.

Don't give them what they want. 

Dare to be different.  Dare to imagine a future where empathy, compassion, and responsibility are the norm.

Let that be your lasting legacy.


© Raena Exe 2024
*All rights reserved.


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